In a perfect world, our Web-master needs our blogs to be finished by noon on Wednesday. Normally, I am ahead of the curve and have mine finished on Tuesday. This Tuesday I was out working an event at the Sonoma Wine Bar for Kelly DiNardo and didn't get home until late. The event was great and I was happy to be there but my blog might suffer this week because of it. Good thing there was wine.

This week is more or less over, so I will skip to next week and give you a run down of what is going on. Okay. I will mention one thing going on this week and then get on to the rest of the goodies. The Smithsonian is hosting an event at Lisner on Friday for a presidential hopeful. That hopeful has just put out a book and we will be selling it at the event for him. I know for a fact that the evening is sold out and there are no more tickets available, so if you don't know what I am talking about, you should hit your favorite night spot and stay out of the Lisner area. If you have tickets for the show and don't buy a book from me, I am going to come over the wall and tickle you until you wet your pants.

On to next week. For the literary out there, there is a new translation of the greatest love story ever out right now. The authors of this new translation are a husband and wife team that have just landed in the states from Paris. If you have ever been curious about Tolstoy's novel, War and Peace, this translation is a great one. Dupont Circle is playing host to the translating duo and they will talk about the process of maintaining the integrity of a story when switching from Russian to English. Anyone who has put together a flat pack piece of furniture knows how hard that really is. -- Using heavy Monkey tool. Strangle bolt 'C' until finished -- I have sent an invitation out to the Russian Embassy and with any luck, there will be some great discussion. Monday night, 7 pm.

Anyone give a crap about the environment? Yeah, me either. Okay, maybe I do a little. If you like the planet we live on, there is a great event going on in the Penn Quarter. Jay Inslee and Bracken Hendricks wrote a little book called Apollo's Fire and would love you to come out and be on the forefront of this new energy revolution. If you were at the Solar Decathlon last weekend, if you care about America's energy independence, this is your event. Word on the street is there will be an introduction by a famousy political person. Might be worth it just to see that. Tuesday Night, 7 pm.

I might be getting a little long-winded in talking about book events. What kind of blog do I think this is? Sheesh. Stick with me for a couple more paragraphs.

Wednesday night (or Ckwednesday night) will be Ricochet at Dupont Circle. A long time ago a nice your man worked as a lobbyist for the NRA. He has uncovered some interesting tidbits about where all that money has gone off to. If you every thought guns were bad or if you are a firm supporter of gun control, you should enjoy this event. I know you can pack heat in the District now, but please don't bring along any visual aids. Well, we haven't had any huge excitement at Dupont for a while, bring 'em on down. Keep the bullets at home though. 7 pm.

Thursday night! (This is the big one!) Every store has something going on! I will just list them out for you because There are so many of them and I am certain you are bored by now.

Old Town Alexandria: Bitter Friends, Bosom Enemies. If you read the paper, you should be there. Iran and the U.S. Need I say more? Brought to you by the Virginia Writers Assoc.

Crystal City: A tastings extravaganza with everyone's favorite pastry chef, Roland Mesnier. There will be snacks and a chat with Roland who is a VERY funny man. He has loads of stories about his time in the White House and a lovely French accent.

Lansburgh: Schulz and Peanuts, a Biography. Charles M. Schulz poured his life into those line drawing kids. The author worked for ages on this book and leaves nothing out. The Schulz family isn't exactly happy with his final product, so it should be a GREAT book. You should get one for the Charlie Brown Lover in your life. The cover alone makes it worth while. -- If anyone was wondering, I named my liver after Linus from the Peanuts... That might be a longer story than will fit right here.

And last, but for certain not least...

Dupont Circle: Gilded Lili, by my friend Kelly DiNardo. Kelly has written Biography of one of the original beautiful trainwrecks. If you find Britney and Li-Lo fascinating and yet shallow, come hear about Lili and how she was living the life WELL before the flash in the pan starlets of today but with a bit more depth to her character. Maybe Lindsey and Britney should come out and hear Kelly speak. -- You listening out there Britt? I know you ain't got nothin' goin' on now that you don't have them kids. Come on out to Dupont and get some education. One of our staff will let you bum smokes off of them.

Sorry about that, you have to speak Southern to them sometimes. That is the breakdown of the next week, should be a little something for everyone. Get out there to a book event and get some culture in your life. You can all go out drinking after you buy a book. Remember, I can only bring you book events if you buy the books. When you don't buy books, you make baby Jesus cry.